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Teacher, Writer, Proofreader

Bye, Tinder, I’m Swiped Out!

No more swiping for me, thanks.

Profile deleted. App uninstalled. Done.

Too time-consuming.

Too many scammers, and by the way, I’ve added screen shots of the latest and final encounters for your entertainment. Take a second to read their captivating bios and text messages.

REMEMBER: These photos have been snatched and attached to fake profiles.

 

 

 

 

How do I know that the third profile is a fraud? Well, first, the mileage is showing 6556 miles away. Close to the same mileage I saw on umpteen other fraudulent profiles. When I searched the distance between Oklahoma City and Lagos, Nigeria, it calculated 6541.9 miles. Coincidence?? I don’t think so.

Additionally, when I searched the first sentence,

I want someone who is upfront and honest, and I will do the same,”

I found it verbatim on a totally separate profile on a separate site. Basically, the entire bio is a copy and paste of romance buzzwords. Just pick a phrase and Google it. You’ll see.

After reflecting upon my 6 1/2-month Tinder journey, I’ve composed the following list of pros and cons of said journey:

  • I’ve sharpened my research skills, specifically, how to reverse search an image on Google and tineye. [PRO]
  • I’ve developed painful tendonitis in my right arm, due to incessent swiping. (At least that’s my official Google-searched medical diagnosis; I’ve not yet gone to the actual doctor.) [CON]
  • I’ve increased disdain for low-life assholes who steal photos, lie about who they are, and prey upon decent people. [PRO? CON? You decide.]
  • I’ve accumulated an ass-load of blog-fodder. [PRO]
  • I’ve gone on a few dates with three attractive, considerate guys. [PRO]
  • I’ve experienced a boost of self-confidence as a result of the aforementioned dates. [PRO]
  • I’ve gained one friend–another positive outcome of the aforementioned dates. [PRO]
  • I’ve missed out on sleep, writing time, sleep, time with friends and family, and did I mention, sleep? [CON]

My Tinder Mission is over. I’m ready to move along. If I never meet a real guy to spend the rest of my life with, that’s fine. If I run into my Romeo, Prince Charming, Mr. Right, or Iron Man while selecting my favorite Greek yogurt or waiting my turn at the pharmacy, even better. I know that I gave it my best shot, and I don’t want to waste another minute swiping left, right, up, or down on a dating app. For now, I have laundry to attend to. And possibly a nap.

Feel free to leave your comments! Thanks for reading!  

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4 thoughts on “Bye, Tinder, I’m Swiped Out!

  1. Damaris Quiñones on said:

    Omg… I’m currently talking with Dan!!! I’ve received many other pictures but they seem so legit, how do I know? I even have his phone number!!

    Like

  2. Selena on said:

    OMG. This guy is on Tinder as Oliver and has sent me a bunch of photos too. Is this for real??? Crazy, I would never send money. I was totally suspicious with the military and being deployed. And widowed

    Like

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